Yesterday, some of the Grand Rapids Friends joined the Holland Meeting for worship and a worship-sharing facilitated by Mary Ann Downey, a traveling minister from Atlanta. Spoken ministry during worship centered around being willing to be molded by God (submitting to God's will) and/or molding oneself according to the leadings one receives from God. I believe in a combination of the two. I can mold myself again & yet again according to the principles of integrity, equality, simplity, and peace. Yesterday, I made a resolution to apply the principles of nonviolent communication & conflict management. Listen, affirm (find common concerns), respond, add. Define the issue/s, identify stakeholders, draw them into the conversation, get the history (if need be--sometimes people can get stuck in negativity on this step), brainstorm solutions, evaluate possible solutions & choose one to implement, define who/what/when/how of the implementation, lay out to evaluate it, and follow up with the evaluation and discussion of the process. These are also the ways of dealing with diversity. Following these principles means waiting rather than jumping in with emotion. Really, really hard for me.
Let the adult self comfort the inner child. Don't let either personality get moldy.